I had just been thinking it’s been a really long time since I got a Free Panty coupon from VS in the mail.  I thought it was a victim of the “bad economy.”  Then lo and behold, their rather pornographic flyer (for Jack?) came in the mail with- you got it- a coupon for a Free Panty.  It always makes me think of Free Mumia for some reason.


So I went, picked out a Panty, and realized that I had dropped the coupon in one of the drawers I was pawing through.  Drat.  So I had to go back and dig through all the previously-dug-through drawers again (ha! drawers!), eliciting the concern of one of the sales staff (that store location is plagued by bra and panty theives who steal by the hundreds).  When I told her what had happened, she said “I’ll keep an eye out.”  Dammit, I got a coupon for a free panty, and I was not going to leave without it.   Although, finding the coupon would have been like Christmas morning for someone else.  But I found it.


I finally got to the front of the line with my booty (ha!!  booty!) and was told, no free colors except for black, white, pink, or nude.  Back to the search…I discovered that the VS “nude” shade has gotten darker.  Now, I am all for a rainbow of God’s skin colors, which to me means, how about more than one “nude” shade?  I am pretty pasty, but my ass is not chalk-white.  The previous “nude” shade suited me fine.  But, I really can’t complain too much, since it was, after all, free.


Got to the front of the line again.  “Is that ALL?”  I really don’t like sales clerks.  “Yes, that is all.”   Whatever.  So I scored my Free Panty!  (Although, with all the hassle involved, that Free Panty was hardly free.)